I’m a dedicated Googler. For everything from the lyrics to an obscure 60’s folk song, to the proper ingredients for tsatsiki, to finding the identity of that plant I saw during my walk the other day. If I want to know something, my first impulse is to Google it.
Unfortunately, a lot of what I want to know is not contained within the confines of cyber-space. It is located in much more difficult place to navigate. A dark and scary place where things tend to skitter away when you try to grasp them. A place wherein dwell thousands of useless bits of information, which can surface with astonishing speed while watching Jeopardy. Little bits of vitally important fact on the other hand, seem to swirl in an endless eddy of a molasses-like pool. They almost come up to where you can see them, only to be sucked back down into the deep.
Thus, my new invention. For those who may not spend hours each day, slacking off on the internet, “IRL” stands for In Real Life, a term used to refer to those things which occur outside chat rooms, bulletin boards, gaming sites and blogs. I present, for your edification- Google IRL 1.1:
I don’t quite have the interface worked out yet, but this little gem will change everything. Now, there will be no fact that you can’t retrieve. Great Aunt Mabel’s, second husband’s name? You know, the guy who wore bedroom slippers to Uncle Milton’s funeral? Just ask Google IRL and within milliseconds, that information can be at your fingertips. For my money though – finding things is where this is going to really shine. How many times a day do I set down one of my 20 pairs of glasses, only to need them 30 seconds later, with no idea of where I put them?
Now, I don’t have to wander aimlessly through my house, looking for those illusive suckers. Just put my question in Google IRL 1.1, hit “search” and in seconds, I will have my answer. 
This is going to be big!
Hurry up! I need this!
WOW .. I’ll subscribe .. if you remind me
You’re going to hit the big time with this one!
The subject matter you Google IRL’d reminds me of the time my mother could not find her glasses. She and my step-dad looked everywhere for hours. Then they argued because this was the third pair of glasses she’d lost recently. Later that day my mother realized she’d been wearing her glasses the entire time! So if my mother were to Google IRL “where are my reading glasses?” the response would be “you’re wearing them, silly!” and beneath that it would say “Duh! You couldn’t read this without them!”
I’d get a letter off to the patent office. Now.
How awesome!
And I thought I was the only person who had that many reading glasses laying around! Yes, one for everywhere I go in the house. And boy, there are days when I walk an extra mile just looking for a pair, so your Google IRL invention will be the best invention in the history of inventions.
The first thing I would Google: “Where has my mind gone?”
Sign me up! This is utterly BRILLIANT!
LOL… That’s HILARIOUS! I love the captions under your websites. Too funny!
LOL so funny
How in the world did you do that? It’s fantastic!!
Yep, you’ve hit on a winner! What a miraculous mind you must have! I agree. Get a patent!
Brenda
I hope you can get this to work. I think everything I own needs a homing chip. And I need a big, honkin’ universal remote strapped to my side to help me find everything I misplace.
Yes, please!
I neeeeeeeeed this. Hurry up with it.
I also need the big remote thingy Flea mentioned. Homing devices for sippy cups would come very handy around here.
I’ll take two please